Ella McCrystle: Seven Poems


Spacebreather (July 2003) interview with links to the poems.


What is writing to you?

That's a really hard question! I guess I sum up what it means to me in the poem Not the Confessional. It's a get-to-know-me process. It can be taxing and horrible and hard and frustrating and embarrassing, and oh, the paperwork! In any event, writing is not only my communion, it's my process of telling and sometimes my prayer.

Is all that too religious? I'm not at all religious, but in a way I find, through writing and the community of other writers I read and write with - hope, expression, ecstasy, wonder, enlightenment. I continually search for all these things, and writing is a wonderful way to do it.


What does it do for you or not do for you?

What is does is allow me to see things in my own light; without them being filtered by someone else's lens. I've never taken a formal writing class. I've done this on my own, for better or for worse. So it allows me to explore everything from my space - which is constantly changing, by the way. In many regards, it helps me line up my problems, fears, loves, pet-peeves, wacky take things, my unique perspective, and it also helps me accept that this is my perspective.

What it doesn't do is solve any of those problems, take away the fear, make love less confusing or cure me of my pet peeves. Instead, it's like a magnifying glass through which to examine all these things. Writing has never solved any of these questions or confusions. I wish it would!


When did you start?

I only started writing somewhere like 3 years ago. I started off journaling, then one day a certain man made me very very angry, and I spewed. But I did it with line breaks and an unruly amount of alliteration, etc. I looked at it and thought, this might be a poem. Since then, I can't seem to stop for very long.


What was the maturing process like?

I've learned a lot! I always read poetry. Always loved it. Writing it is a whole new ball of wax. I joined a critique group and got honest and clear direction. The poets on the Internet Writing Workshop have been salvaging me from myself ever since. I've tried to learn more about the "craft" that goes into writing, well - mostly editing. I write fast and furious, then the editing process can be like plucking eyebrows - every twinge is a teensy pain. I've learned a bit (just a tiny bit) about reining in on an idea, not just writing sentences and chopping them into lines. I've learned to focus. I've learned that the whole world is full of wonderfully overwhelming metaphor, and I can't run amok in the whole world at once. I've learned to tighten things up, cue in to an idea, fantasy or feeling, but never ever to let my feet completely stay on the ground when I write. If my feet are completely on the ground, the poem stinks. Lately I am drawn more to reading poems in form, and I see it showing up in small ways in my poems.

Writing is a process I've really just started. I am well aware that the poems you post in this issue will make me cringe someday soon, and I look forward to that, because that means I'm growing.


What's happened to you that is ultimately interesting?

In writing or in life? I've already explained anything I find interesting about writing. My life is so interesting you'd need several servers to hold all that stuff!


Why are you a writer?

I love to read, I'm a word junkie and a bookworm, I've been a lover of the written word since childhood, but the real reason is: I don't seem to be able to stop at the moment. I just keep doing it. It's sort of like worrying - I can't stop it, even though I'm sure it must not be helping my mental state much.


What is the most sour sound in the world?

ears folding, refusing to hear, or even to try. Not only is that sound sour, it is bone-crushing.

If you were to come back as a mosquito, what would you experience?

Conflict over whether I should bite or not. I would want to bite, being a mosquito, but I know how it feels to get bitten. This would render me completely conflicted! Gosh. I hope I don't come back as a mosquito. I never thought of that option before. I thought I had covered them all. Yikes.

If you were on a mountaintop, what would you be thinking?

I would probably be my usual neurotic self and think that everyone else, were they on the same mountaintop, would be having a much "deeper" experience than me. This would cause me to lose all perspective on the experience, and I would probably decide that I may as well be at home being stupid. So, I'd leave, and once I was off the mountaintop, I'd kick myself in the teeth for not just living the experience for goodness' sakes!

Why do potato chips "crunch?"

They are supposed to - it's what they are. They are "being." Plus, I think most are really thin and fried. I have no idea, but I would guess that has something to do with it.

© 2003 Ella McCrystle
First published in Spacebreather
July 2003

...listening for the hiss since 2003
All content © 2003-2006 Ella McCrystle